From Conditioning to Conscious Choice: Reclaiming Our Humanity

From the moment we are born, society begins to condition us. It shapes us to fit predefined, gendered roles that uphold rigid systems and long-standing norms.

What troubles us most isn’t what we inherit, but how we are taught to adapt instead of question. People treat inherited practices as sacred, even when they no longer serve anyone. We follow systems without asking who they benefit or whether they still make sense in the world we live in today.

Society trains men to become providers and discourages them from acknowledging their emotions, desires, and vulnerabilities. It trains women to put family first and, over time, to abandon the small joys and passions that once made them feel alive. In this framework, people trade happiness for obligation.

These roles do not emerge by accident. Generations pass them down through fear and insecurity. In earlier eras that were marked by slavery, divide-and-rule politics, and survival-based societies, people Haanad to obey to stay alive. Power depended on compliance.

Today, many nations claim political independence, yet our mindsets remain bound. Our systems still operate through fear, control, and unexamined beliefs. Authority has changed its shape, but conditioning still directs our choices.

This system does not serve men, women, or society as a whole. It suppresses emotional intelligence, authentic connection, creativity, and growth. People are taught to survive rather than to live.

We break this cycle through healing.

We begin by healing ourselves, by unlearning what others imposed, questioning what we inherited, and reconnecting with who we truly are. From there, we name what no longer works. We speak up. We start conversations, challenge beliefs, and consciously replace fear-driven patterns with compassionate, life-affirming ones.

No map is offered for this path; it is created and built step by step, belief by belief, brick by brick.

This is the way forward.

We must move beyond maintaining society and toward experiencing contentment, joy, peace, and satisfaction. We must create systems that help us grow into the future systems that honor individuality, emotional well-being, and our shared humanity.

We are not here to survive our lives. We are here to live inside them.

About the Author:

Shikha Poddar Dhingra is a Trauma-Informed Holistic Therapist

Shikha established Shikhaheals in February 2020 to explore the ways thoughts and emotions relate to physical well-being. Her work centers on creating supportive, non-clinical spaces for individuals navigating stress, chronic illness, and unresolved or unexpressed emotional experiences.